S PLUS

DATING; WHAT IT'S MEANT TO BE!

Dating is no longer, what it used to be. You also have to realize that your boyfriend or girlfriend had his or her own friends’ priority to meeting you. Dating is about learning and exploring the possibilities that exist in a relationship and figuring out if the relationship can move to the next level. You cannot expect your partner to abandon his/her lifestyle to fit in with yours.
Here are three things you should not do when dating:

Expect Your Partner to Give Up “Me” Time

Everyone deserves to have some “me” time where he or she relaxes and loosen up after working hard or taking care of business. Do not expect your partner will be around you 24/7. Your partner deserves to have some alone time where he or she can wind down without being disturbed. Every relationship should have time out where each partner can relax without choking the other partner up.

10 Common Leadership and Management Mistakes

Avoiding Universal Pitfalls

Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.– OSCAR WILDE

It's often said that mistakes provide great learning opportunities. However, it's much better not to make mistakes in the first place!

In this article, we're looking at 10 of the most common leadership and management errors, and highlighting what you can do to avoid them. If you can learn about these here, rather than through experience, you'll save yourself a lot of trouble!

1. Not Providing Feedback

Sarah is a talented sales representative, but she has a habit of answering the phone in an unprofessional manner. Her boss is aware of this, but he's waiting for her performance review to tell her where she's going wrong. Unfortunately, until she's been alerted to the problem, she'll continue putting off potential customers.

According to 1,400 executives polled by The Ken Blanchard Companies, failing to provide feedback is the most common mistake that leaders make. When you don't provide prompt feedback to your people, you're depriving them of the opportunity to improve their performance.

To avoid this mistake, learn how to provide regular feedback
to your team. (You can use our Bite-Sized Training session on Giving Feedback to gain an in-depth understanding of feedback, and to learn how to provide it effectively.)

2. Not Making Time for Your Team

When you're a manager or leader, it's easy to get so wrapped up in your own workload that you don't make yourself available to your team.

Yes, you have projects that you need to deliver. But your people must come first – without you being available when they need you, your people won't know what to do, and they won't have the support and guidance that they need to meet their objectives.

Avoid this mistake by blocking out time in your schedule
specifically for your people, and by learning how to listen actively
to your team. Develop your emotional intelligence
so that you can be more aware of your team and their needs, and have a regular time when "your door is always open", so that your people know when they can get your help. You can also use Management By Walking Around
, which is an effective way to stay in touch with your team.

Once you're in a leadership or management role, your team should always come first - this is, at heart, what good leadership is all about!

3. Being Too "Hands-Off"

One of your team has just completed an important project. The problem is that he misunderstood the project's specification, and you didn't stay in touch with him as he was working on it. Now, he's completed the project in the wrong way, and you're faced with explaining this to an angry client.

Many leaders want to avoid micromanagement
. But going to the opposite extreme (with a hand-offs management style) isn't a good idea either – you need to get the balance right.

4. Being Too Friendly

Most of us want to be seen as friendly and approachable to people in our team. After all, people are happier working for a manager that they get on with. However, you'll sometimes have to make tough decisions regarding people in your team, and some people will be tempted to take advantage of your relationship if you're too friendly with them.

This doesn't mean that you can't socialize with your people. But, you do need to get the balance right between being a friend and being the boss.

Learn how to do avoid this mistake with our article, Now You're the Boss

. Also, make sure that you set clear boundaries
, so that team members aren't tempted to take advantage of you.

5. Failing to Define Goals

When your people don't have clear goals, they muddle through their day. They can't be productive if they have no idea what they're working for, or what their work means. They also can't prioritize their workload effectively, meaning that projects and tasks get completed in the wrong order.

Avoid this mistake by learning how to set SMART goals

for your team. Use a Team Charter
to specify where your team is going, and detail the resources it can draw upon. Also, use principles from Management by Objectives
to align your team's goals to the mission of the organization.

6. Misunderstanding Motivation

Do you know what truly motivates your team? Here's a hint: chances are, it's not just money!

Many leaders make the mistake of assuming that their team is only working for monetary reward. However, it's unlikely that this will be the only thing that motivates them.

A NEW NIGERIA I SEE; THE REAL INDEPENDENCE

Nigeria is my country and I love her, am so grateful for all she has and all she will be. Happy Independence Everyone, there is only a nation called Nigeria because you and i exist, we are the Nigeria of today. I believe in a developed Nigeria, a Nigeria that is the envy of other nations, for a man at the age of 55, there is a lot of expectations. I believe that every citizen of this great nation deserves;

A Nigeria where police men have enough that they don't need to collect money.

A Nigeria with exceptional Health and Educational institutions.

Thoughts you and I have had and will keep having everyday of our lives. Purposeful!!! PART 2.......Passion.

Several people have tried several things in the name of finding satisfaction and fulfillment. Many have been able to only find Passion. I feel there are two paths we can take to discover our purpose. The first is passion. What are you passionate about? What do you really care about? What would you live for? What would you die for? We ask several other questions just to find our real passion and this includes;

1. What makes you smile? (Activities, people, events, hobbies, projects, etc.) 
2. What are your favorite things to do in the past? What about now? 
3. What activities make you lose track of time?
4. What makes you feel great about yourself? 
5. What are your deepest values? 
6. What are you naturally good at? (Skills, abilities, gifts etc.) What do people say you are good at?
   
7. What do people typically ask you for help in?
8. If you had to teach something, what would you teach? 
9. What would you regret not fully doing, being or having in your life? 
10. Who inspires you most? (Anyone you know or do not know. Family, friends, authors, artists, leaders, etc.) Which qualities inspire you, in each person? 
11. Given your talents, passions and values. How could you use these resources to serve, to help, to contribute? (to people, beings, causes, organization, environment, planet, etc.) 
12. What were some challenges, difficulties and hardships you’ve overcome or are in the process of overcoming? How did you do it? 
13. What causes do you strongly believe in? Connect with? 
14. If you could get a message across to a large group of people. Who would those people be? What would your message be? 
15. You are now 90 years old, sitting on a rocking chair outside your porch; you can feel the spring breeze gently brushing against your face. You are blissful and happy, and are pleased with the wonderful life you’ve been blessed with. Looking back at your life and all that you’ve achieved and acquired, all the relationships you’ve developed; what matters to you most? List them out.

         Answering these questions helps you know more about yourself but Passion is not 100 percent foolproof, but it will get you into what I call the location, the area, the neighborhood of what your purpose really is.

This is not the ultimate way since it is not 100 percent acurate and this comes from the fact that it is only from your efforts. There still abound a level of ignorance you will definately need to surmount.

  On the next part we will see the second and most profound way to discover Purpose and even a better way to know more about your passions.

Thoughts you and I have had and will keep having everyday of our lives. Purposeful!!!

On a cool afternoon some years ago at the office where observed my six month 400 level internship as an undergraduate, a friend and classmate we worked together said, "I don't think am going to end up in the ICT field". This was a bit surprising to hear a 400 level Computer Science Student say such. It didn’t take too long to figure out what prompted such a statement from my friend.
 I soon deducted from our conversation that certain thoughts had refused to leave my friend’s mind. He had been battling with these thoughts. And these disturbing thoughts were for the future. 
Thoughts you and I have had and will keep having everyday of our lives. Instantly I knew it was all about one question, the question of Purpose. There was an dis-settlement in his mind and this was caused by; 

1. The unclear path to fulfill his aspiration.

2. The fact that he didn’t even know what exactly the best path to follow to a fulfilling future was.

3. Fear of failing his desire to be wealthy and help people.

 I know you know about this feeling too; it is common to everyone with a common sense. My friend wanted to be one of the best in his field, influential and impactful. He never wanted a life of need, helplessness or poverty, but I know one thing for sure, the way to his desire is finding his purpose. 
 Now, the question is “Have you found your purpose?”.

What are you filling that vacuum in your heart with?

I think there are two paths we can take to discover our purpose.

 Follow me on the next part...

GREATER LIFE: Perfectionism - The Dangerous Trap!

GREATER LIFE: Perfectionism - The Dangerous Trap!:                                                                          Perfectionism - The Dangerous Trap! Just when I have some...

LIFE STREAM WORSHIP

                       LIFE STREAM WORSHIP

You can't afford to miss some opportunities in life, Life Stream Worship is one. An unadulterated atmosphere of worship.

Creating Opportunity From Oddness

Interesting works: Creating Opportunity From Oddness: An enterprising person is one who comes across a pile of scrap metal and sees the making of a wonderful sculpture. An enterprising person...

Creating Opportunity From Oddness

An enterprising person is one who comes across a pile of scrap metal and sees the making of a wonderful sculpture. An enterprising person is one who drives through an old decrepit part of town and sees a new housing development. An enterprising person is one who sees opportunity in all areas of life.

To be enterprising is to keep your eyes open and your mind active. It's to be skilled enough, confident enough, creative enough and disciplined enough to seize opportunities that present themselves...regardless of the economy.
A person with an enterprising attitude says, "Find out what you can before action is taken." Do your homework. Do the research. Be prepared. Be resourceful. Do all you can in preparation of what's to come.

Enterprising people always see the future in the present. Enterprising people always find a way to take advantage of a situation, not be burdened by it.

And enterprising people aren't lazy. They don't wait for opportunities to come to them, they go after the opportunities. Enterprise means always finding a way to keep yourself actively working toward your ambition.

Enterprise is two things. The first is creativity. You need creativity to see what's out there and to shape it to your advantage. You need creativity to look at the world a little differently. You need creativity to take a different approach, to be different.


What goes hand-in-hand with the creativity of enterprise is the second requirement: the courage to be creative.

You need courage to see things differently, courage to go against the crowd, courage to take a different approach, courage to stand alone if you have to, courage to choose activity over inactivity.

And lastly, being enterprising doesn't just relate to the ability to make a living. Being enterprising also means feeling good enough about yourself, having enough self worth to want to seek advantages and opportunities that will make a difference in your future. And by doing so you will increase your confidence, your courage, your creativity and your self-worth - your enterprising nature.